| Logs |
2003 February 16
| Idlewild |
| Realms |
Retired
| Reality Fault |
General Info
 |
| Realms: Idlewild Logs |
February 16
Steven has been standing his watch, and he sees by the hour that it is time for Aiden to stand last watch. His visions have been troubling him through his watch, though he did not let himself dwell upon them to the detriment of his watchstanding. Quietly, he pads over to the place where the elfkin is sleeping. "Aiden," he whispers, gently nudging his shoulder. "Aiden, time to wake up, it's your watch."
Aiden makes a muffled noise of protest, but rolls over and sits up, slowly. He stretches and then stands. "Night, Steven.."
Steven says, "I'm not sleeping yet. Once you get settled in and awake, there's somethign I need to talk with you about.""
Aiden sits down a little way from where he was sleeping and nods. "Go ahead. I'm all ears.."
Steven sits down beside Aiden, and considers for a moment. "As you know," he said, "I meditated and asked Pelor for guidance. I asked two questions: what would happen if I accepted Seodil's offer to .. I don't know, gain a skin, and what would happen if I did not." He pauses. "He showed me a series of visions, possibilities, potentialities. There was one set of visions which were identical between the two."
Aiden nods, "Go on.."
Steven goes on to describe, as best as he can, the fleeting images of the Hunt -- how some visions saw it with fifteen members, and others as many as fifty. How there was one great white wolf, whom Steven suspects to be the reigning King of Winter. And the battles... the fighting. Crowds of shapeshifters charging at each other and rending each other apart. He goes on to relate the scene of the ice throne. In some of these visions, the King of Winter seems to have been defeated, and sometimes Sol is on the throne, more often Lua... and, once, even Aiden, looking alone and sad.... There is so much to say, and so confusing still it is. He concludes by saying, "These are only possibilities. None are what will happen. They are whay may happen. I am worried that the choice of entering into the Hunt will be one that could too easilly lead to grief." He pauses. "I am not saying we should not. I am not saying you should not. But what we hope to achieve and what we might reap could be very different."
Aiden frowns, "I had a feeling this would come down to battle, Steven. I can't, in good conscience, turn my back on this. Not now.. not after everything. If it comes to battle, then it comes to it. I can't not go on.."
Steven says quietly, 'Not merely battle, Aiden. I wouldn't turn away from that, either. I'm not that much of a pacifist; Lord Pelor entreats us to fight what is wrong, and sometimes that means feeding someone their ankles. NO, it wasn't the fighting itself. It was the sence of what was going on around and because of the fighting....
Aiden sighs. "If it comes, it will come. It sounds bad. It could be worse if we're not there.."
Steven says, "In particular.. I do not think we know fully what being a part of the Hunt means. In my first set of visions, the heads of that pack I would see fighting between themselves. And then there were the other visions. While killing Seodil might not be all that unpleasant for you, what about the rest? Sol fighting Lua, Lua fighting you. Me fighting Seodil or Lua...." He shakes his head. "I don't know. We are on a decision gate, I know, and we will need to make a decision. Just... I had to tell you this, Aiden. And, yes, there was the peaceful scenes. I would fight and hopefully not die in the process, to see those come about. I guess what I'm saying, is that a lot can happen, some of it... not good. You are right, though." he stands, stretching a little. "If we do nothing, it will be worse. I didn't get that from a vision; I'm just certain of it. It's the way of things.""
Aiden nods, "If that was in your visions whether you joined or not, it may already be too late. Steven.. I want this. I've never felt more alive than I did when I was in wolf-form."
Steven nods quietly. "I know. I've seen that." He smiles. "You feel like you're... at home here, comfortable, moreso than back in the Grey World?"
Aiden nods, "Yes.. exactly."
Steven nods. "I feel the same way." He nods. "I'll see this through, one way or another. I'm not going to walk away from this, either."
Aiden nods again, "Then we'll walk together, Steven."
The world has greyed while the two men of uncertain elven heritage speak,and Seodil rises from his furry rest as a naked elf. He bothers to put clothes on this time, unhurried and deliberate, before he looks to see who else is awake and ready. Sol moves to sit in the middle of the clearing, waiting for the touch of the moon.
The moonlight comes slow enough to see tonight, creeping silver fingers through the black and grey trees to touch the waiting wolf. His silhouette runs together like mercury and flows upward into his familiar elven shape. He, too, immediately dresses, and with care, before turning a solemn face to his sworn companions.
Aiden is, of course, up and dressed. He's sitting where he was during his watch and looking like he's trying desperately hard not to pace or make other nervous gestures.
Soleil's pupils are huge in the darkness, and only his unsteady hands betray nerves as he steps toward Aiden and Steven. "Are we of one mind tonight, my friends?" he asks softly. He ignores Willow, who seems content to be ignored... even a little frightened, especially of Seodil who stands motionless in the night, silent and watching.
Aiden nods up at Sol, but can't seem to find his voice.
Steven nods quietly, dressed and up and awake as well. Externally, he's very calm and collected. For once.
Sol grins fleetingly, but the whites of his eyes show along with his teeth. Seodil speaks out of the night as he steps to Willow's carefully-tended fire and picks up a fairly thick burning stick. His voice is eerie tonight, devoid of emotion and entirely alien. "Those who have chosen to seek their skins tonight, follow me. I promise you that there will be pain if you do, and I will deliver it. I promise you on my name that I will inflict no more than necessary, and will protect you from everything that you meet tonight except yourself. Do not follow me unless you will obey me without question tonight, for your life is in my hands."
Seodil turns and walks away into the darkness, neither quickly nor slowly.
Aiden stands up and bows his head, taking a deep calming breath. He looks up, looks at Steven and Sol and follows Seodil.
Steven swallows, and nods, glancing to Aiden as he walks forward to follow Seodil. He breathes slowly as his master had taught him, controlling his breathing through his tanden-point as he follows the burning stick through the shadows.
Soleil steps forward also in sync with Aiden, and moves to walk by his side with Steven.
The firebrand leads the supplicants at a steady pace through the unfamiliar woods, drifting ahead at the same distance for a time of nearly painful suspense until it stops. Everyone can hear a river talking nearby, and smell the cold water. Seodil waits for them to catch up on a riverbank over a short drop into black water.
Steven glances at the water. Water, again. I hope it's not as cold as the last one....
Aiden comes to a stop a couple of feet behind Seodil and stands, arms hanging down at his sides, looking serious.
Soleil reaches out briefly to seize both his companions' hands for a quick squeeze, then drops them and takes a deep, shaky breath.
Steven blinks, and squeezes Soleil's hand briefly before the young man disappears into the shadows...
Seodil's thin smile and glittering silver eyes are suddenly backlit by cool fire as the nearly full moon emerges from her clouds. Silver wars with the orange of his firebrand and casts odd shadows across his face as he says, "What occurs tonight will remain between us. We will emerge from this night's work bound closer than kin, if your hearts are true. If you fail, it will not be my malice, but something within you. Whatever we were to each other before, or will be afterwards, tonight I am your leader, your guard, and your torturer. Love or hate me, but do exactly as I say for your own safety, and this will not kill you."
Aiden nods, and finally managed to find his voice. "I place my trust in you, Seodil." He falls silent again..
Steven remains calm, even as he nods silently. Inside, he is slowly, mentally performing katas for calmness.
Seodil nods once, approvingly, and waits. Sol's soft, "I am in your hands tonight," comes from the group, and Seodil bends from the waist to stab his burning branch into the ground. Straightening, he says, "Remove your clothing," and begins to strip off everything he wears.
Steven casts a glance to Sol. I thought he had already done this...? he thinks, then unhesitatingly and unselfconsciously strips down.
Aiden strips down to the skin, leaving his clothes bunched next to him on the ground.
As he throws his garments casually to the ground, Seodil says, "This is your old skin," and kicks the pile a short distance away. Sol follows suit, murmuring, "This is my old skin."
Steven has never been particularly tied to his clothing, as cobbled together and piecemeal as it is. He recognizes the patterns in the ritual, as he shuffles them to the side, intoning softly, "This is my old skin."
Aiden pushes his clothes farther away with one foot and follow's Sol and Seodil's lead. "This is my old skin."
Seodil straightens and pulls up his firebrand. He smiles and beckons to Sol. "You wish to be purified of your curse through this renewal. You know what comes next. Will you go first?"
Soleil bows his head and steps forward. "I will."
Steven frowns a little, fairly sure he can see what comes next. Traditionally, in the rituals his maste rintroduced him to, there are two elements which are used for purifications. One is water. The other....
Seodil looks at the others and says, "Come forward then and stand beside your brother. The elements witness what we do, but only Earth is truly ours. This is to show you that Fire and Water may serve us at times, but we are not their masters."
Aiden steps forward to stand beside Soliel. He watches Seodil closely, helplessly curious about the ritual.
Steven nods quietly, stepping forward to stand beside Soleil, biting his lip silently.
Seodil adds, "This is going to happen quickly. Remember that when it is happening to you." He then sets Sol on fire without changing expression, and stands still a long moment while Soleil's hair catches. The smell is terrible, but Sol stands there until Seodil says, "Go to the Water!" Only then does the burning elf jump into the river, and come up wet but no longer alight. He stands waist-deep and says quietly, "I am not of Fire."
The naked elf with the burning branch smiles and says, "Who is next? Step forward and follow suit."
Aiden steps forward..
Seodil reaches out, and sets Aiden on fire, smiling.
Aiden clenches his teeth and waits for the words..
That makes Steven blink. Even in the most awful wushu movies he's seen, they've never done anything quite like that. He glances to Seodil, and wonders if he is enjoying this. If it is the nature of the Hunt to bring joy in others suffering such as this, he starts to think, then catches himself before that thought goes further. Then I am going to ensure some changes are made. I am a child of Light, I am a servant of Pelor. Light and warmth are my companions, and the glorious golden fire of my Lord is a beacon of hope and succor and comfort to all who wish it to be. By the light of the Sun am I renewed....
They come, but it seems much longer than it did watching Sol burn. Still, despite the pain, a certain odd sense of disconnection from reality starts to take over Aiden.
Aiden jumps into the water at Seodil's queue, coming up a few moments later with a gasp and says, "I am not of Fire."
Sol's hand finds Aiden's again, and stays. Oddly, the other elf is faintly smiling.
Aiden squeezes Sol's hand.
Seodil turns to Steven and waits for him to step forward, looking unhurried.
Steven takes in a deep breath, and steps forward, keeping his eyes open even as he does the litany of his faith. I am of the Golden Light. Pelor, stand with me! I am a luminous being, light and life are your domain. I am a fully realized person in my own right, and there is no pain which this body cannot stand. (I hope.) May your grace shine down upon my and bathe me in your warmth and comfort....
The onlookers see that Steven is set afire for the same length of time that the other each witnessed externally, and that Seodil is watching him with complete and very serious attention to timing before he cries out the ritual release.
Steven holds hmself as still as he can through the short time it takes before Seodil tells him to go to the water. I am a luminous being in service to my Lord -- huh, well, that's pretty hot -- in service to Lord Pelor. I am of Fire, the Fire of my Lord--
He is underwater for a few moment, before leaping upwards, taking in a sharp breath, panting. he turns to look up at Seodil, though eh doesn't seem to be looking at the elf directly. "I do not live in fire," he says, surprisingly calmly. He has a sense of near-euphoria, something he has so rarely felt in his ablutions to his deity, and he finds himself curious and also elated.
Sol blinks and smiles at Steven, looking thoughtful.
Seodil's calm is creased briefly by a near-frown, but it smooths as he steps off the drop and joins the others in the water with a splash, deliberately plunging his brand underwater with an extinguishing hiss.
Seodil says, "Water is our next witness, and the last test of will before we meet our more sympathetic allies. Soleil." He looks at Sol, and the golden elf releases Aiden's hand and steps forward almost into Seodil's arms, turning to face away from the older elf. He looks serene, despite his prior knowledge of the ritual and the fact that Seodil is cradling him in his arms and leaning him backwards into the water much like an old-fashioned baptism...
Aiden might have been jealous, but the pain has faded away, leaving him feeling a little detached and almost euphoric.
The silver elf says almost tenderly to Soleil, "Do you accept Water as your next witness?"
Sol whispers, "I do," and does not struggle as Seodil lowers his face under the surface. Seodil looks at the others and says, "Water is our ally, but not our element. We will not change into a creature of water, nor..." he looks down at the underwater Sol, who twitches suddenly, convulsively, "...can we breathe it."
Aiden clenches his jaw again, fighting down an urge to help Soleil.
Seodil pulls a coughing Soleil back into the air and helps him breathe again, bending for a moment to share a breath with him before setting him easily onto his own feet again. Sol says a bit hoarsely, "I call Water to witness that she is not my element, though we be allies."
Sol moves aside, and Seodil waits.
Steven glances to Aiden, reasoning they might as well keep the same order. Consistency is important in a ritual.
Aiden swallows and steps forward, so he's a breath away from Seodil.
Seodil takes Aiden gently in his arms and repeats the ritual words, then the ritual drowning...
Aiden goes under the water easily enough. He did say that he was placing his trust in Seodil. However, a few moments under the water and the euphoria and fear go to war. His mind trusts Seodil, his body swears that Seodil is trying to kill him. Just as his body's reflexes to fight start to kick in, Seodil pulls him up, coughing up the small bit of water that got into him. Seodil gives him the ritual breath and Aiden coughs once more before saying, "I call Water to witness that she is not my element, though we be allies." He steps back from Seodil, coming to Sol's side again.
Seodil nods approvingly, and waits for Steven, calm.
Now it's Steven's turn to have the flicker of a frown. Aw, man... me and the deep-southern evangelical baptists never really got along.... He prays silently, if Pelor would grant it, calmness and warmth and serenity even while submerged and detatched from the warmth of the heavens. But he steps forward unhesitating, euphoria and fear warring. Unlike fire, there is no escape from water, and there is no link between the element and his god. He says the ritual affirmation, accepting water as his witness, as Seodil drowns him. It is, surprisingly, not entirely terrifying, despite the helplessness he feels. Surely, Seodil could easilly hold him under for an hour. But the large elf does not hold him under for longer than Steven can bear, and with the breath of air from Seodil he starts to understand the nature of this. I am died, and reborn, brought into the life of the Hunt? is that it? He feels no malice from the Hunter, after all. THough he splutters a little with the words s
Though he splutters a little with the words sealing the element of water as his witness and not being of it, now that the fear is passed he is calmer, and the feeling of euphorian begins to return.
Seodil says briskly, "Air is our ally, though it cannot support us without Earth," and manages to get gracefully back onto the riverbank and wait there, dripping. Soleil murmurs agreement and follows immediately, but looks every inch the waterlogged elf.
Steven pulls himself out of the water, some part of his mind wondering how Air could be held as a witness. Is he going to try to smother us under a pile of leaves? he thinks half-disjointedly.
Aiden climbs out of the water after Sol. He stands in the night air, wet now, and shivering a little. He looks absolutely elated about the whole thing, though.
Seodil waits for everyone to regain dry land, then scoops up a handful of dirt and smears the mud across everyone's forehead and over their heart in turn as they step up. He says in a slight singsong, "Air welcomes your breath and bears witness to what we do tonight, but Earth is our strongest tie. Without the land, we are nothing; we starve, we sink, we fail. We protect the land as it protects us, for we are never truly seperate. Do you so swear to join me in this?"
Aiden nods solemnly. "Yes, I do."
Soleil says in ringing tones, "I do, with all my heart."
Steven says, quietly, "I do," though he wonders if this causes a conflict; for is he not also of Lord Pelor, whose symbol is the firey sun? He puts it aside for now; his spirit-soul has not changed, and that is what is important to Pelor.
Seodil picks up his knife from the ground and unsheathes it, and grins. "We seek to become brothers in spirit, though we were not born to the same parents; thus, I give you my blood to bind us all."
The silver elf hands the knife to Sol and holds out his arm. Soleil cuts a shallow gash into Seodil's smooth pale skin, and bends his head to touch his lips to it. His companions see him swallow, and step away with bloodied lips, smiling.
Sol hands the knife to Aiden. Seodil keeps his arm outstretched, features serene.
Aiden takes the knife and pauses a moment, to steady his hand. He doesn't want to cut too deeply. He takes Seodil's wrist in one hand and makes a shallow cut with the knife in the other. He bends to the wound and takes some of Seodil's blood into his mouth, swallowing it. He licks his lips as he straightens, swallowing again. Finally, he releases Seodil's wrist and turns to hand the knife, handle first, to Steven.
The cynic in Steven was wondering when they'd get to the blood part. He does not relish spillin blood with Seodil; he saw quite enough blood in his visions. But there is no helping that now. He recognizes the need for it in the ritual; bit by bit, it starts to come together for him, the pieces of ritual forming a whole. His stomach churns a little at the thought of drinking blood (Ugh!) but surely it is no worse than ... well... no worse than.... uhm... hmm. Well. All right, so it's probably the most disturbing thing he's done in his life. He has a feeling it won't be the last. He takes the knife, only a little reluctantly, and goes to Seodil. He doesn't aim for exactly the wrist, cutting a little further up the arm. The blood is much as he expects it to taste, coppery and hot and not at all pleasant, but he forces it down as he straightens, offering the blade back to Seodil.
Steven blinks, suddenly feeling light-headed after he swallows. The euphoria has gone into high gear -- nay, it's started using nitro. HIs heart races; he feels really good! One little part of his mind is watchign his reaction wide-eyed and wondering what happened -- it isn't merely the strength of the ritual, not for something like this. Maybe... maybe there really is something within Steven's blood....
Seodil takes the blade, wipes it clean against his skin, and resheathes it, strapping the belt back on. He dips his fingers in his own blood and paints them across the dirt-smeared foreheads and chests of the three, saying "Let us be together now in mind and heart. Run with me!" A certain elation shows in his eyes as well, as he whips around and hits a long-legged stride off through the trees.
Aiden is so high on emotion, elated and euphoric, that he does the only thing that he can do. He runs, following Seodil into the forest.
Steven has utterly no thought for what brambles and branches might hit delicate bits of his anatomy -- he's too excited. Run! Run far, run fast, just run! Not run in fear, not run in flight, just run! So... he does. He runs. Somehow, he feels the elf's pulse as his, the elf's heartbeat as his, feels the urge and need and desire to run and run and run....
Sol runs lightly, joyously between the men, a grin on his face and slender muscles flexing like springs. Surprisingly, this time, they can both keep up with the purebred elf...
Even as he runs, even as Steven looses himsel fin the euphoria of the running, the calm, meditative part of him is still wary. Rituals of this sort usually involve a sacrifice, beyond the symbolic death. Seodil's blood... may not be the end of it. Watch and be careful, little one, he remembers his master saying once. The one who jumps forward at the slightest hint of action or excitement often finds that to be their last action in this world.
A deer bursts from cover, and Seodil and Sol swerve to follow her immediately. One of them, impossible to tell which, raises his voice in a joyous, hungry cry, and the other follows close behind him in harmony. Desire swells in the runners, and hunger.
Aiden swerves as Seodil and Sol do, to chase down the deer. He's increasingly feeling like part of a pack. He knows their intent as soon as they do and that, more than anything, is the cause of the jubilant grin on his face.
Steven doesn't even know or care who it is who raises the hunting-call. All he can sense is the movement of the deer, it's motion, the fact that it's fresh meat for the hunt...!
The deer runs for a timeless space, the pack hard on her heels, moving as one. The end is almost inevitable, as eventually she stumbles and they are upon her in a tangle, rhythm of the chase broken in a swelling tide of victory. She dies quickly as the hunters spring forward. The meat and blood smell entirely edible as Seodil's teeth rip into her shoulder, then he stands back for the others to take their turn in the consummation of the ritual night.
In another time, another place -- hell, another state of mind, Steven would consider this barbaric. But here and now, there is nothing more natural than to take down the dear and feast, joyfully. Indeed, it seems eminently natural.
Aiden shifts into wolf-form as Seodil does, just before Seodil tears her throat. He waits, tail swishing from side to side, until Seodil stands back. He bites into the deer's flesh and eats, licking his chops after he swallows.
Soleil's tongue lolls redly between his parted jaws as he looks up at the others between bites.
Steven feels like he changed at some point, but the for the moment he neither knows nor cares. For the time being, it really doesn't matter how he crunches down on the shank of the deer, gnawing chunks of meat from the bone with force that would break his own jaws if he tried it.
Aiden is about to bend his head to rip off another chunk of meat when he pauses to look at his companions. He stops to look at Steven and his tail stops moving. He cocks his head off to one side, looking about as confused as a wolf can.
Steven has opened his mouth to take another nice juicy piece of meat from the haunch he's been worrying over, when he notices Aiden looking at him. He pauses, frozen in place, his mouth open, as his large, hazel eyes, so nicely attuned to the moonlit night, flickers over to Aiden. "Er, yes?" he asks. No, that's not right. It comes out as "Mrrrrl?" The large, bronze-furred cat that blinks curiously at Aiden wonders what's wrong. In a moment, he realizes what's wrong, or rather so right. Oh, yes, he thinks, not realizing his own difference from the others. We've changed! We've... done it....!
Aiden bends down to eat more of the deer while it's still warm and fresh, but he can't get the nagging thought that something went really wrong somewhere out of his mind. He's concerned for his friend and a little sad for him too.
Seodil's change back to an elf triggers the others to follow suit, and their voices are restored. "Well," he says, eyes narrowed at Steven. "You'll still be able to keep up, at least." He sounds surprisingly neutral, given the successful change, to Steven.
Steven swallows a little, the taste of raw venison fresh in his mouth and not at all unpleasant. He does not answer Seodil, though his mind, just barely free from the levels of euphoria they had experienced before, races. It must be my bond to Pelor, he thinks. That I am linked to fire instead of Earth? Could that be it? I don't know, I don't know! He isn't sure, but he feels like some of the possibilities form his visions have evaporated, while others have crystalized....
Aiden stands, silently watching and letting Seodil speak.
The sun has crept up on them all while time took strange paths over this past night, and the golden light reaches slowly across the land to touch them, one by one. Sol watches it as if hypnotized, ignoring even Steven as he waits for the touch.
Steven holds Seodil's gaze for a little while longer, before turning to the sunrise as it comes up, letting out a breath as he silently greets Pelor... and watching Soleil carefully, praying that the curse, for him at least, has been lifted.
Aiden follow's Sol gaze up to the sky, realising immediately the importance. He watches, forcing himself to remember to breathe.
As the bright warmth touches Soleil, it gilds his naked... elven... body... and continues lighting the forest floor in cheerful stripes.
Aiden lets out his breath in a huff and laughs.
Steven slowly breaks into a smile, letting out the breath he'd been holding.
Soleil starts crying, soundlessly, while he smiles. Seodil, for once, has nothing sarcastic to say.
Aiden reaches out and puts his hand on Sol's shoulder. He gives it a light squeeze and leaves it there.
Sol's laugh, with the occasional elven hiccup, joins Aiden's. He hugs his own knees and laughs til the tears stop, then looks up to give Aiden one of the most purely joyful looks he's ever received, before standing and offering a hand to both Aiden and Steven.
Steven smiles, and takes the hand offered to him warmly. "I'm glad to be seeing this," he says, a bit lamely, not sure what else he couldd say.
Aiden takes Sol's hand, returning the smile. "Sol.. I'm so pleased for you.."
Seodil murmurs, "My lord," and goes to one knee. "Will you lead the pack? My night has ended."
Soleil grins at his companions and says, "Steven, I'm so glad you found yourself. It doesn't matter that it's not as one of the Hunt; you are my friend and ally. Aiden... I don't even have words." He looks at Seodil and simply nods, as if he'd expected nothing else. "Shall we return to camp? I'm afraid there's not much time for sleep, but we must retrieve Willow before we go on."
Steven smiles wider, then, and nods. "Through thick and thin, no matter what happens, I will be here."
Aiden just beams at Sol. "I'm yours."
Sol grins back at Aiden, eyes alight, and says, "I'll take you."
Aiden grins at Sol. "Do."
The golden elf claps Steven warmly on the back, and says, "Then let us depart together, my friend." He gives Seodil a hand up, the silver elf oddly quiet, before slanting Aiden a look and saying, "Shall we?"
Aiden nods at Soliel. "Ready.."
Steven nods enthusiastically, for the time being not worry what his own change means.
The new pack leader grins and shifts again, a wolf-grin meeting his companions' eyes even as they shift again in response-- apparently, the reaction is triggered by the leader, at least for now, even for Steven. Sol sets out for camp again at a comfortable lope.
Aiden follows Soleil back to the camp, keeping pace with him.
Steven follows after, as he shifts, glancing over to Seodil briefly after changing... and bounds forward in aperfectly feline and un-wolf-like manner, tail curling.
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